Found this on a frens blog pretty hillarious and thought i might share it here:
Adoption of English (Euro-English) as the Official European Language
Subject: Improvement of English Spelling
The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was the other possibility.
As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5- year phase-in plan that would become known as "Euro-English".
In the 1st year,
... "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make the sivil servants jump with joy. The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.
In the 2nd year,
... there will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like fotograf 20% shorter.
In the 3rd year,
... publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible. Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always ben a deterent to akurate speling.
Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is disgrasful and it should go away.
By the 4th yer,
... people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with "z" and "w" with "v".
During ze fifz yer,
... ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou" and after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl. Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.
Und efter ze fifz yer,
... ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze forst plas.
Monday, April 24
Wednesday, April 5
Annie Buddy? Sum Buddy? Annie Wan? Sum Wan? Noel Wan?
Hmm need to post something...but what? was reading back thru everything i wrote on the net and i found an old one written 2 years back in my profile in myspace might as well archive it here ....
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Kinda cool to see something u thought off is circulating around the internet. Heck it was a joke me and a couple buddies of mine made while having a drink at a local 'mamak' (well not exactly a mamak, don't know if one wud call Rasta in TTDI a mamak, well anyways...) One of those session where anything that was said we were pissing ourselves laughing. Hehe we were drunk with laughter u cud say, as Sham wud have put it, we are laughing like drunks minus the alcohol.
Was talking about funny and strange names encountered with fir and sham. One such name was Mr Mohd Sori or something (man i pity him la, the guy's parent must have been sorry to have him, kidding >:):Þ...) and sham related to me a call he had to make to a miss annie wan (man that was too good a chance to pass up la *wink²* ) So ended up we spent the whole night joking about a phone conversation between the 2 of em.
I emailed them and a few other frens few days later, next thing we know, 6 month down the road I receive back the joke we made, hence, we're immortalised on the net...was told it made rounds in maxis...fir and sham we had fun that night didnt we ;)....wieeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee...hehe
Annie Buddy? Sum Buddy? Annie Wan? Sum Wan? Noe Wan?
===========================================
Sum Wan: Hello can I speak to Annie Wan
Mr Sori: Yes u could speak to me.
Sum Wan: No, I want to speak to Annie Wan!
Mr Sori: You are talking to someone! Who is this?
Sum Wan: Im Sum Wan. And I need to talk to Annie Wan! Its urgent.
Mr Sori: I know u are someone and u want to talk to anyone! But what this urgent matter about?
Sum Wan: Well just tell my sister Annie Wan that our brother was involved in an accident. Noel Wan got injured and now Noel Wan is being sent to the hospital. Right now Avery Wan is going to the hospital.
Mr Sori: Look if no one was injured and no one was sent to the hospital from the accident that isnt an urgent matter! You may find this hilarious but i dont have time for this!!!
Sum Wan: You are rude. Who are you?
Mr Sori: Im Sori.
Sum Wan: You should be sorry. Now give me your name!
Mr Sori: Im Sori!!
Sum Wan: I dont like your tone of voice Mr and i dont care, give me your name!
Mr Sori: Look lady, I told you already Im Sori! Im Sori!! Im SORI!!! you didnt even give me your name!
Sum Wan: I told u before im Sum Wan! Sum Wan!!! You better be careful my father is Sum Buddy. And my uncle holds a very big position in the company. He is Noel Buddy.
Mr Sori: Oh im so scared(sarcastically).Look i dont care about ur uncle, he's a nobody. Everybody thinks he's top dog and has an important position in the company.
Sum Wan: No Avery Buddy just married my aunt. And Avery Buddy doesnt work there.
Mr Sori: Like i said i dont care which one of ur aunt screws everybody and i also know that not everybody works here! Jeez!!!
Sum Wan: Which Wan(dont have any idea on how to alternatively spell the name) is my sis!
Mr. Sori: I dont know which one is ur sis! Why in gods name you think i do!? Look i got work to do and if im feeling mischievious i'll broadcast it on the P.A system saying:
"Attention, someone called and said that anyone's brother just got involved in an accident. But not to worry no one got injured and no one was sent to the hospital. But everyone is going to the hospital anyways. The father maybe a somebody but if u're their uncle, u're a nobody. And its not true about her aunt screwing everybody becos i havent screw her yet."
how bout that!?
Toot....Toot....Toot.................
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Kinda cool to see something u thought off is circulating around the internet. Heck it was a joke me and a couple buddies of mine made while having a drink at a local 'mamak' (well not exactly a mamak, don't know if one wud call Rasta in TTDI a mamak, well anyways...) One of those session where anything that was said we were pissing ourselves laughing. Hehe we were drunk with laughter u cud say, as Sham wud have put it, we are laughing like drunks minus the alcohol.
Was talking about funny and strange names encountered with fir and sham. One such name was Mr Mohd Sori or something (man i pity him la, the guy's parent must have been sorry to have him, kidding >:):Þ...) and sham related to me a call he had to make to a miss annie wan (man that was too good a chance to pass up la *wink²* ) So ended up we spent the whole night joking about a phone conversation between the 2 of em.
I emailed them and a few other frens few days later, next thing we know, 6 month down the road I receive back the joke we made, hence, we're immortalised on the net...was told it made rounds in maxis...fir and sham we had fun that night didnt we ;)....wieeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee...hehe
Annie Buddy? Sum Buddy? Annie Wan? Sum Wan? Noe Wan?
===========================================
Sum Wan: Hello can I speak to Annie Wan
Mr Sori: Yes u could speak to me.
Sum Wan: No, I want to speak to Annie Wan!
Mr Sori: You are talking to someone! Who is this?
Sum Wan: Im Sum Wan. And I need to talk to Annie Wan! Its urgent.
Mr Sori: I know u are someone and u want to talk to anyone! But what this urgent matter about?
Sum Wan: Well just tell my sister Annie Wan that our brother was involved in an accident. Noel Wan got injured and now Noel Wan is being sent to the hospital. Right now Avery Wan is going to the hospital.
Mr Sori: Look if no one was injured and no one was sent to the hospital from the accident that isnt an urgent matter! You may find this hilarious but i dont have time for this!!!
Sum Wan: You are rude. Who are you?
Mr Sori: Im Sori.
Sum Wan: You should be sorry. Now give me your name!
Mr Sori: Im Sori!!
Sum Wan: I dont like your tone of voice Mr and i dont care, give me your name!
Mr Sori: Look lady, I told you already Im Sori! Im Sori!! Im SORI!!! you didnt even give me your name!
Sum Wan: I told u before im Sum Wan! Sum Wan!!! You better be careful my father is Sum Buddy. And my uncle holds a very big position in the company. He is Noel Buddy.
Mr Sori: Oh im so scared(sarcastically).Look i dont care about ur uncle, he's a nobody. Everybody thinks he's top dog and has an important position in the company.
Sum Wan: No Avery Buddy just married my aunt. And Avery Buddy doesnt work there.
Mr Sori: Like i said i dont care which one of ur aunt screws everybody and i also know that not everybody works here! Jeez!!!
Sum Wan: Which Wan(dont have any idea on how to alternatively spell the name) is my sis!
Mr. Sori: I dont know which one is ur sis! Why in gods name you think i do!? Look i got work to do and if im feeling mischievious i'll broadcast it on the P.A system saying:
"Attention, someone called and said that anyone's brother just got involved in an accident. But not to worry no one got injured and no one was sent to the hospital. But everyone is going to the hospital anyways. The father maybe a somebody but if u're their uncle, u're a nobody. And its not true about her aunt screwing everybody becos i havent screw her yet."
how bout that!?
Toot....Toot....Toot.................
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